Nick Timothy: Blame the Irish, don't blame me

If you're not a politics nerd you may not even know who Nick Timothy is, nor how he played such an instrumental role in causing the current Brexit chaos.

Nick Timothy

He's one of those Rasputin type characters who skulks around in the political background giving terrible advice, while other more prominent figures take the blame when it all goes wrong.

He was one of Theresa May's top advisers during her time at the Home Office (where she dreamt up "Go Home" vans, the unlawfully racist Hostile Environment, brutally misogynistic spouse immigration rules and all kinds of other shockingly inept and hard-right authoritarian nonsense) and then during her time as Prime Minister too.

Nick Timothy is widely credited as the adviser who insisted that Theresa May completely eschew political consensus and then draw her ridiculous red lines to completely rule out any form of membership of the Single Market and Customs Union.

He's also advised her to call her snap "hubris" election in 2017, and advised her to continually hide herself away in Tory safe spaces, chicken out of the leadership debates, and make their disgraceful "Dementia Tax" a central feature of the campaign!

As a result of this idiocy the Tories squandered their 20+ point lead in the space of seven weeks, and pissed away their parliamentary majority, leaving them begging and bribing the bigoted DUP sectarians into propping up their absolute shambles of a government.

Oracles of ineptitude

Shortly after the 2017 general election meltdown Timothy was understandably sacked, and soon took up residence as a columnist for the dreadful Barclay brothers' Daily Telegraph propaganda rag, which he uses to settle old scores and blame everyone else for his own messes.

Essentially he's like the Tory version of Labour's John McTernan. The shadowy adviser who oversaw Labour's annihilation of their own Scottish heartlands in 2015, when they lost 40 of their 41 seats with an absolutely useless pro-austerity and rabidly British unionist campaign, both of which were widely regarded as unacceptable Tory collusion.

But somehow both of these useless characters are still given well-remunerated public platforms to spout their lamentable nonsense, as if they're infinitely wise political oracles, rather than two of the most inept political advisers in living memory.

Blame the Irish

Timothy's Telegraph column could, and probably should, be sub-headed "How everyone else is to blame except for me".

In this week's instalment he desperately seeks to blame the Irish, and specifically the Irish Taoiseach Leo Varadkar for the Irish border deadlock with a claim that Varadkar is "playing fast & loose with peace in Northern Ireland"!

This is an extraordinary claim from one of the masterminds behind the "red lines" that created the Irish border deadlock in the first place.

Ruling out regulatory alignment with the EU was always going to end up contradicting the Good Friday Agreement, and endangering the open border between the Republic of Ireland and the North.

That's why political commentators at the time accused Theresa May of lobbing peace in Northern Ireland onto her raging Brexit bonfire.

We could see that she'd put herself into an irresolvable bind, but she was so relentlessly stubborn that she just ploughed on belligerently until this impossible contradiction eventualy destroyed her political career.

Thick Nimothy

○ Nick Timothy was Theresa May's main adviser when she decided to run Brexit as a closed Tory shop exclusively for Tory party advantage, rather than seeking some kind of national consensus (under which we would probably have already left by now).

○ Nick Timothy advised Theresa May to put herself in an impossible bind by drawing ridiculous red lines all over her shambles of a negotiating strategy.

○ Nick Timothy advised Theresa May to call her hubris election.

○ Nick Timothy helped Theresa May throw away her parliamentary majority and render herself utterly reliant on the DUP sectarians with nonsense like "Dementia Tax" and the endless repetition of "Strong and Stable government" from within the Tory safe spaces she sealed herself within.

And now this absolute nincompoop is attempting to shift blame away from himself by cynically whipping up anti-Irish sentiments!

He's not alone

Brexit has already gone spectacularly wrong. The government missed their own self-imposed Brexit deadline in March 2019 and ended up pathetically begging the EU for an extension because we'd failed to sort our shit out in time.

And now we're heading full throttle towards a "no deal" Brexit meltdown administered by Boris Johnson and the most shockingly right-wing Tory cabinet in history.

When it all comes crashing down, the people responsible will obviously resort to the same kinds of Timothyisms:

It's not our fault ... it's the EU ... it's the Irish ... it's the civil service ... it's Merkel and the Germans ... it's the pessimistic Remainers ... it's the social liberals ... it's the EU citizens in the UK ... it's left-wing bloggers ... it's Corbyn and the Labour Party ...

It's always everyone else to blame except for the people who actually did it!

And to think that the Tories are the political party who endlessly bang on about the importance of taking "personal responsibility"!

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